OK, tell me if you think this is NOT a sweet deal. Codeine in liquid form, plus I HAVE to take it with food. Is there a better vacation? If so, I don’t want to know about it.
I don’t watch Oprah because she frightens me, but I know she’s talked about junkie soccer moms and other “normal” people addicted to pain pills from C-sections and back surgery. I totally understand.
However, I am way too much of a scaredy cat to get beyond the legal stuff and get involved in illegal drugs because:
I don’t want to go to jail (all you have to do is see “American Me” to know you never EVER want to go to prison)
I would rather spend money on clothes
I am forgetful as it is without drugs making me forget important stuff like don’t put the dog in the oven or that we don’t have a fireplace
It would be pretty sucky for my poor husband (although he’s used to a wife who barely cooks or cleans)
It would put me in contact with some unsavory members of society
The shakes are super unattractive – I hear you sweat a lot and throw up, and since I have not thrown up since June 6th 1989, I would like to maintain my record
But sanctioned drugs! Now…that’s different. I can see how people would become fuzzy on the use vs. abuse line. I cannot be critical. But are we allowed to enjoy them?
One of the best vacations I ever had was when I got my wisdom teeth pulled. All I did for 5 days was lay in my bed, take Demerol, watch movies, and eat mashed potatoes. I don’t even remember going to the bathroom. It was pure bliss.
And now, the only thing preventing me from enjoying my Codeine moment is this pesky sore throat. So don’t bother calling… I’ve still got half a bottle, and a whole pantry of soup.