I fancy myself an expert. On what?...you might ask. Oh pretty much anything and everything. Some people would say I am opinionated. But I really don’t try and push my opinions…ahem…my expert opinions on others; I am really a live and let live kinda gal.
But recently, emboldened by my regular watching of “What Not to Wear” (American version), I feel the need to tell it like it is…to strangers…
For instance…
I often pass by a complex of doctor and dentist’s offices. This week, a clean cut looking man in a button up shirt and slacks (not jeans) was picketing the offices along the main road with a sign that said: “American Dental is untrustworthy.”
This impressed me for several reasons: A) the man was well dressed and seemingly poised unlike the union stand-ins that picket malls and other such large jobs where it’s easy to get screwed by contractors etc B) the use of the word “untrustworthy” was more insightful, carried more depth and resonance than, say, “sucks” or “cheated me”…
But then the very next day, I saw the same man and the same sign, but this time he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt, unbuttoned, bare chest showing, and shorts with flip flops. His credibility went out the window. I SERIOUSLY contemplated pulling up to the curb and saying something like: “Just so you know, yesterday, when you were dressed nicely, I actually cared about your cause; was curious about it…but today, you look like just the kind of jerk who would picket a dentist’s office instead of handling the matter in a different way…say like a letter from a lawyer…”
But as the light changed, I chickened out. Besides, it was Friday, and who knows…maybe there is some unspoken dictate that says that picketers can dress down on the weekends, too.
Other moments where I just wanted to walk up and begin with:
1. “Just so you know… that kind of attitude will get you no where.”
2. “Just so you know…a shampoo, a set of dentures, a couple of highlights, and not having your crack show would do you wonders!”
3. “Just so you know…screaming your kids in public is seriously frowned upon.”
4. “Just so you know… it’s 2005, not 1985.”
5. “ Just so you know…showing skin between your shirt and pants is SO passé! Don’t you ever read a magazine?”
6. “Just so you know… I’m totally going to blog about this.”
6 comments:
Flip flops? Really? If I felt the need to picket I would wear good, sturdy, sensible shoes.
...and thank you.
Carrie...this doesn't suck. I just wanted you to know.
And by the way...my favorite comment from your husband was the night I said, "Todd. I think your wife really does know everything" and he replied, "She is really good at saying things in a way where people think that."
Just so you know, you're hilar. You should do more fashion posts. I know that you feel bad telling me things in person, so your blog can be your way of communicating to me what's not working for me--like my hawaiian shirts. . . and my crack.
What about orange rubber clogs, black terry cloth pants, and a light pink shirt at the Chef's Table Saturday brunch?
When I was ten the family went to a fancy restaurant. I was wearing a pretty church dress but had not removed my dirty, thread-woven friendship bracelet (I was 10 and it was cool) and as I was washing my hands in the bathroom this snooty lady came over to me and said, "you know that doesn't go with that, right?" and all I could say was, "yeah." Mom was outraged on my behalf. The rule is, no saying "just so ya know" to a sweet child. Bratty ones need to be scolded though, especially in this day and age where kids run rampant and the parents are too busy at work or smoking crack to discipline.
I saw the same guy on both days that you saw him and even though I am no fashion expert, I had the same reaction.
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